Thursday, March 20, 2008

The Dial-Up Conspiracy

As I being writing this the time is 3:04 PM. I went online today at roughly 10:30 AM. One of the first things I did was check if Ewen left a comment responding to my previous comment in the last entry. Yes, I know these are thoroughly sad details.

The point is that it has been nearly five hours and I haven't been able to post my reply. I've been trying on and off during those five hours, hoping that the tides of bandwidth will somehow have cleared. So far, nothing.

This is pissing me off, because where I live there's no broadband access. And even if there was, broadband's not cheap. And this is leading me to place some credence in my father's theory about a great conspiracy to boost broadband sales by 200% once the cables (which are apparently being laid in a Labor initiative) are out by slowing up dial-up more than it has already been.

This rings true for me, as over the past two months our internet has been running slower than ever before. I suppose there are a few possible explanations:

a) Our ISPN has radically grown in terms of clients and its server is at breaking point. But I would think it would have trouble maintaining that sort of customer base with such terrible service...

b) Internet use in general has expanded to the point where there is less bandwidth across the board and is universally slowing. Seems a bit simplistic of a read...

c) I have thousands of trojans and worms in my system that I am oblivious to, syphoning off all my precious bandwidth. Bastards.

Of course, even that last one is incredibly unlikely as I have an anti-virus program that is updated every day, a firewall, and perform full scans of the system with two programs at least twice a day. So... there's no other possibilities. I'm going to go ahead and blame Telstra for this, as they have screwed my life over in so many other ways as well...


And, for the record, the post I was originally going to make in "PMG Seasn 3 Review" went thusly:

*SNIP*

EDIT: 4:06 PM. Nevermind that bollocks. I've posted it now. Only needed another hour. I was just being impatient, clearly.

3 comments:

Youth of Australia said...

I cannot judge this objectively as I am too busy being pissed off at my own computer. My BitComet downloading thing was getting worryingly slow, to the point I was thinking I could clone myself six hundred times and then produce what I wanted for myself before the things finished downloading. Then, some whacky update window appeared, I clicked on it, and now the downloader is replaced with a far less helpful and even SLOWER version! I can't pause downloads any more, prioritize them, or even see at a glance how they're working! And the stuff I was downloading has reset to zero!

GOD DAMN!

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

...wow. Thanks for the perspective.

That's why I barely ever download. It only leads to tears.

Youth of Australia said...

I HATE YOU, INTERNET!!!!!

Just as I was getting Rob Shearman's only Sylvester McCoy story, too...