Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Debate of the Century!

Or, "It's apparently all too possible to have internet arguments in the real world"


ME: Oh, yeah, I finally saw Waters of Mars.

FRIEND: You did? What did you think?

ME: Not that impressed.

FRIEND: Saywhat?

ME: It was alright, but didn't do anything special. Too much of a character piece.

(The VILLAINOUS AK emerges on the scene)

AK: Hey there.

FRIEND: Jared was dissing Waters of Mars!

ME: Yeah. I was a little disappointed.

AK: Oh, Jared, what's your problem now! By all means go and murder Steven Moffat and take over the show, make your own Colin Baker-style stories, wouldn't that make you happy? Wouldn't make things better?

ME: Why would I murder Steven Moffat? He isn't running the show.

AK: Yes he is!

ME: I know he's taking over but he isn't at the moment.

AK: Russell T. Davies has finished his episodes and Steven Moffat is now the producer.

ME: The one I watched clearly said "by Russell T Davies and Phil Ford"

AK: Yes, but Steven Moffat is the producer.

ME: He was not credited as producer of that episode.

AK: Steven Moffat is the producer - look it up online.

ME: He had no responsibility at all for the episode I'm talking about, though - and it was made before he became producer.

AK: Why are you trying to correct me? Everyone knows he's producer!

ME: I'm just saying that the logic doesn't follow through.

AK: You always have to be right, don't you? Always! Well you're wrong, Steven Moffat is the producer of Doctor Who!!

ME: I didn't even argue that.

AK: YOU'RE ARGUING RIGHT NOW!

ME: My argument was never on that point. I just said he had nothing to do with that episode.

AK: YOU CAN'T ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG, CAN YOU?!

ME: So it wouldn't make sense for me to murder him.

AK: THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE! I SHALL KILL YOUR FIRST BORN!

ME: If I was going to murder anyone, it would be Phil Ford.

AK: THE PATH TO HADES SHALL BE PAVED IN YOUR BLOOD, AND THOSE OF ALL YOU HAVE EVER LOVED!

ME: You might have expected me to say RTD, but firstly he's contributed a lot to TV, is very talented and generally I like him and also I don't think he wrote much of the episode judging by the finished result.

AK: THERE ARE NO WORDS FOR THE TORTURE YOU SHALL SUFFER AT MY HANDS, LEST YOU ADMIT GRAND MOFF TARKIN IS THE ONE WITH WHOM YOUR IRE IS BOUND IN SINFUL POLYGAMY!

ME: Yeah, but still, he didn't have anything to do with the episode. Which, by the way, was not homicide-inducingly bad unlike, say, The Lazarus Experiment.

AK: Hey, now you're bagging my favourite episode. You're a bum!

FRIEND: That was an unecessary escalation!

(All laugh. Freeze frame to credits)


The actual argument may have been more heated on the part of The Villainous AK.

4 comments:

Youth of Australia said...

Who the fuck is "AK"?!

Well, at least WOM wasn't as bad as the one on the bus - something I think everyone agrees on.

I mean, it could have been like Something Borrowed...

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

Who the fuck is "AK"?!

Just a dude in my class. His initials are AK, which amuses me because of the Kalashinikov connection.

Well, at least WOM wasn't as bad as the one on the bus - something I think everyone agrees on.

Yeah, as my review will tell you sometime soon I had no real issue with WoM, it was just rather underwhelming after the hype.

Youth of Australia said...

Just a dude in my class. His initials are AK, which amuses me because of the Kalashinikov connection.
It seems appropriate.

Yeah, as my review will tell you sometime soon I had no real issue with WoM, it was just rather underwhelming after the hype.
Another downer of the gap year. They HAVE to ridiculously hype every one.

For the record, apparently RTD DID write most of it, reworking Ford's original script "Red Christmas" - not very different, except there was no time paradox business and the Doctor effortlessly saved everyone for a happy ending and a Christmas dinner. So everything from the rocket blowing up onwards is 1000% RTD, better or worse.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

...well that's the GOOD stuff.

My review is up now... I actually didn't write much about the 'Timelord victorious'. Guess I'm just waiting to see how it pans out.