Thursday, January 28, 2010

Things I learnt from Stargate: Atlantis

* Hair gel increases your wise-cracking power

* Guys who carry around guns tend to have wildly unrealistic expectations of what balding scientists can achieve single-handedly

* Connected to the last point, amazingly balding scientists' cognitive abilities and genius DO increase when confronted by furious men shoving guns in their faces

* When you travel at the speed of light into a forcefield... you get fucked up. Not an amazing fact but something I'd never thought of

* The spirit of Terry Nation lives on in American sci-fi

* If you're going to have a badass knife-fight between two female characters do not get a couple of over-excited pornstars to provide foley, as this may well ruin the effect.

* Scotland is a separate nation from the United Kingdom.

* Connected to this fact only person not from Canada or the US should be allowed to speak per day.

* Also, it's fun spotting flags.

* Too much hair-gel decreases wise-cracking power, but the mind may not be aware of this deficit.

* Guys who play chess in high school know how to make nuclear weapons

* I've no idea really who she is, but Torri Higginson is quite hot. To me personally, anyway.

* If you ever complain that a black guy in the main credits gets no lines and does nothing, the next episode he will get a ton of lines and reveal himself to be a complete arsehole.

* The Amish are evil.

* Hyper-glycaemia is HI-larious.

* Insert joke about black chicks with wigs here.

* The best way to make use of your resources when you have a 300-500 strong crew on a base is to send the same 4 people on a mission every single time. Just make sure one of these guys is a genius who is entirely indispensible to your operations with no self-defense, oft-professed cowardice, has said several times he's willing to sell everybody else down the river. If Dr Smith from Lost in Space is not available settle for Rodney McKay.

* If the final wisecrack of an episode is actually piteously unfunny, make it hilarious by showing the characters around the crack-ee shuffle around awkwardly, shake their heads before just walking out.

(NB: According to the commentary they actually showed past the end of the take because they had to fill for time. Which if nothing else explains what the fuck was going on)

Suffice it to say I am really enjoying the show a lot.

3 comments:

Youth of Australia said...

I cannot comment as I'm pretty certain I've fallen behind when it comes to SGA. The last one I remember seeing was a kind of satire-drama thing where Rodney and Whatisnamethegoodlookingherodude discover the Ancient RPG they were playing controlled evolution on an alien planet, so they arrive to find they are gods to two warring tribes they made up for a laugh.

Or was it the one where SGA gets closed down for a week but everyone teams up back to save day and reset button everything?

But yeah, I like the show.

Jared "No Nickname" Hansen said...

I'm actually only just watching the first series on DVD - it's got a weird combinationg of really good writing and awfully cheesy writing that I find intriguing.

Youth of Australia said...

The Season Cliffhangers aren't too bad either.